Until the Stars Look Big

Caring for another and putting in effort to see them smile, make them happy, show them that you care. It seems simple enough, yet it can be one of the toughest things to do. Why? Perhaps it's the fear that your actions won't be reciprocated. Maybe it's the desire to have more power in the relationship. Or it just might be the misconception that if we refuse to show our sentiment, it will magically disappear.


I feel that there's a significant difference between caring about someone and caring for someone. Most of us, I hope, care about everyone we know, from family to acquaintances and maybe even strangers. We would be willing to help anyone in need as long as we have the necessary means to do so. However, truly caring for someone is a whole different story. It's more than simply being there for someone when some sort of crises arises and help is needed. It's more about going out of your way to do something nice for someone. It's about wanting to take care of them. It's about wanting to lessen their worries and sorrows. Why? Well, just because, just because you can, just because you want to. No reason, just because. 

What is it about those select few that land them in such a coveted position? Do they actually deserve it or are they automatically placed there due to some unbreakable bond or inexplicable connection? Maybe a bit of both. Sometimes, relationships don't have an explanation or reason why; they simply form, and they simply are.

I'm an all or nothing type of person. If I attempt something, I give it my all. Similarly, if I'm invested in someone, truly invested, I'm all in. It becomes difficult for me to hold myself back. However, the truth is that not everyone that is placed on a pedestal deserves it. What if the one you care for isn't able to display their affection? What if your efforts aren't being reciprocated? Do you continue to care because you're just that good of a person or do you stop even if that means succumbing to their carelessness? What if the random acts of kindness are what makes you who you are, and you're unwilling to lose sight of that regardless of others' actions?

That's probably the worst part, having to choose between the little acts of affection that make you who are or holding yourself back because that's what makes sense. While the tide of confusion can be agonizing, with its passing comes unquestionable clarity. If your actions refuse to be reciprocated, you will most likely lose the urge to continue the efforts. It's only natural. By the same token, if the emotions are true and strong, the mind will find a way to rationalize it. Sometimes, it just takes time to find certainty as to where others stand in your life and where you stand in theirs.

A Few Words of Love from One Man

We’re all fighting our own battles. While some are tougher than others, there is always some sort of struggle, no matter how big or small. Sometimes, it can just be a struggle to get up in the morning and put that smile on. Sometimes, it can be a struggle to get through the day. Sometimes, it can be a struggle to find a moment of peace.

"Where there is no struggle, there is no strength."

Despite the various struggles, we encounter countless people throughout our lives. Some remain mere strangers that we exchange smiles with, others become acquaintances that we exchange casual words with and a select few find their way so deep into our hearts that we end up exchanging a part of our lives, a part of our struggles, a part of ourselves.

When we find ourselves constantly fighting our own battles, what is it that makes us fight for others? How are we able to forget our own struggles, even briefly, in order to fight for someone else? When do someone else’s struggles become more important than our own? How do those select few make their way so deep within our hearts?

Perhaps, we all have that nauseatingly soft side that wants to see the ones we care about happy. Maybe, it’s just nice to have something to distract ourselves from our own problems. And for certain people, we just want to be that person. The person that can make a difference, the person that they can go to, and most importantly, the person that can miraculously heal all of their wounds.  Or maybe, we’re just secretly hoping that they would be willing to do the same for us.

But, what if they don’t? What if the person that you would be willing to go out of your way for doesn’t seem to be willing to reciprocate your actions? Well, that’s probably one of the worst feelings, and there’s no way around it. At first, you may attempt to make excuses for the person. You try your best to use all rationale to defend their actions or lack thereof. And after a while, you’ll probably run out of excuses and be forced to face the facts.

The truth is, these actions, or lack thereof, can be hurtful. However, it’s also true that the urgency to help someone, share with them or stick by their side is not something that can be forced. It’s either there or it’s not, and it’s not something you can hold against someone. Another truth is that just because someone doesn’t care for you the way you want them to or isn’t able to show that they care, doesn’t mean that they don’t.

"Whenever you feel like you are on an emotional roller coaster, just find the person who makes the bumps a little smoother, the curves a little straighter and the free falls a little less scary."