Safe Here With Me

Faith, it's what gets us through the day. Whether it's faith in God or some other sort of higher power or faith in yourself, there is something that makes each and every one of us look forward to another day. There's something that helps us get out of bed in the mornings and move on with our lives regardless of the circumstances.

Like most other things in life, faith can be inconsistent. Life-altering events, tragedies and miracles, can either wither our faith or instill it within us stronger than ever before.

As I witnessed a new-found friend's faith in one of his strongest friendships, I couldn't help but wonder when I lost sight of my own. This led me to question some of my own relationships, especially the ones that I have left behind. When did I lose faith in people and relationships? When did I start being satisfied with the idea of letting go and moving on rather than fighting for the ones that matter most?

Is it the pragmatic side of me? People come and go; it's a part of life. Just as there's a reason for them to surface when they do, there must be a reason for their departure as well. Sometimes, people simply grow apart. People seek different things from life and therefore embark on different paths to obtain them. Other times, uncontrollable factors, such as detached emotions and feelings or bad timing and distance, get in the way. It could be a clash of personalities or just an unresolved misunderstanding. Or there might be no apparent reason at all. Sometimes, relationships just fade.

People often lose significance in our lives while others gain it. That's also natural. It doesn't mean we constantly seek replacements. Everyone has their own special place in our hearts, however it's astonishing to witness how quickly things can change. How do we go from speaking to someone on a daily basis to suddenly losing all contact? Similarly, how does a stranger gain the privilege to hear about our thoughts, feelings and experiences as if they have always been a part of the journey? When the person that already knows it all disappears, how do we suddenly gain the courage to start all over with someone new?

It's all about being open to the possibilities. No one can be sure what kind of significance someone can hold in our lives or what they will have the capability of teaching us. However, once they become a part of our lives, it's almost becomes a bit ineffable to realize where we would be without them. Not in the sense that we would not survive without them, but in a more momentary sense. Had this person not entered your life, who would you be talking to at this very moment? Who would you be spending your days with? Who would you be sharing your life with? It's all part of a larger plan. We may not comprehend it in the moment, but looking back, all of the pieces suddenly somehow fall together.

Yearning to Be Heard

Everything I write is just a fraction of the countless words that are constantly running through my head at any given moment. Sometimes, I wish I had all the time in the world just to release them in a more concrete way. Although writing is the most precise way for me to articulate myself, sometimes you have no other choice but to speak, vent even, and let others know how you feel.

When something is bothering me, when there is an issue or conflict, my first instinct is to talk about it. There is no other way to inform someone about how you feel than to simply tell them. That is also the only way to completely hear the acknowledge the other side, fix things, realize where you stand or even show effort. None of us are mind readers, so it's unfair to assume that any other person can know precisely what you think or how you feel and vice versa without any form of communication.

Agreed that sometimes people and situations need their time and space, too much time can be harmful. If you allow too much time to pass by, is there anything left to discuss? People say that time heals all wounds. Time allows you to move on and in some cases, it can create distance.

One of the main reasons that I have been able to keep up with this blog, other than my love and passion for writing and encouraging followers, is my inability to control my focus. If something is bothering me, it bothers me until I fix it. If there's something I need to say, I will butcher it in my head until I get the opportunity to unleash my words and liberate my thoughts.

Even though this trait usually leads to honesty and conflict resolution, it has a downfall. Communication is a two-way street. If I'm writing, it's so someone will read it. If I'm speaking, I need the other person to listen. Keeping my thoughts to myself isn't always an option but is necessary if others aren't willing to make an effort to hear me out. The frustration attained from the inability to express myself is indescribable. The extent of the distress is able to overpower my mind for days.

They say that actions speak louder than words. However, sometimes hearing what you least wanted to and speaking the most difficult words are necessary. Everything else leaves room for interpretation, room for the possibility that things could be different. And sometimes, the lack of actions speak even louder. The silence can sometimes be just as powerful as the words yearning to be heard.