Until the Stars Look Big

Caring for another and putting in effort to see them smile, make them happy, show them that you care. It seems simple enough, yet it can be one of the toughest things to do. Why? Perhaps it's the fear that your actions won't be reciprocated. Maybe it's the desire to have more power in the relationship. Or it just might be the misconception that if we refuse to show our sentiment, it will magically disappear.


I feel that there's a significant difference between caring about someone and caring for someone. Most of us, I hope, care about everyone we know, from family to acquaintances and maybe even strangers. We would be willing to help anyone in need as long as we have the necessary means to do so. However, truly caring for someone is a whole different story. It's more than simply being there for someone when some sort of crises arises and help is needed. It's more about going out of your way to do something nice for someone. It's about wanting to take care of them. It's about wanting to lessen their worries and sorrows. Why? Well, just because, just because you can, just because you want to. No reason, just because. 

What is it about those select few that land them in such a coveted position? Do they actually deserve it or are they automatically placed there due to some unbreakable bond or inexplicable connection? Maybe a bit of both. Sometimes, relationships don't have an explanation or reason why; they simply form, and they simply are.

I'm an all or nothing type of person. If I attempt something, I give it my all. Similarly, if I'm invested in someone, truly invested, I'm all in. It becomes difficult for me to hold myself back. However, the truth is that not everyone that is placed on a pedestal deserves it. What if the one you care for isn't able to display their affection? What if your efforts aren't being reciprocated? Do you continue to care because you're just that good of a person or do you stop even if that means succumbing to their carelessness? What if the random acts of kindness are what makes you who you are, and you're unwilling to lose sight of that regardless of others' actions?

That's probably the worst part, having to choose between the little acts of affection that make you who are or holding yourself back because that's what makes sense. While the tide of confusion can be agonizing, with its passing comes unquestionable clarity. If your actions refuse to be reciprocated, you will most likely lose the urge to continue the efforts. It's only natural. By the same token, if the emotions are true and strong, the mind will find a way to rationalize it. Sometimes, it just takes time to find certainty as to where others stand in your life and where you stand in theirs.

Empty as the Wind

Far too often we give up simply because we feel that our efforts are not benefiting us in any way. We're in an age of instant gratification. We want what we want and we want it now. Unfortunately, not everything works that way. If you really want something, you will stick with it in hopes of improvement regardless of praise and recognition.

At the same time, kind words don't hurt. Sometimes, that's all we need for encouragement. The same goes for compliments. I believe that words are powerful, written or spoken, and they should not be taken lightly. All it takes is a few kind words to make someone's day, to make someone smile, which I think is the most beautiful thing. Those few kind words could be what brings laughter to their day, a subtle sparkle to their eye or meaning to the perfect moment. The words people use express so much of themselves, whether they realize it or not, as do their actions.

Just as our words and actions display fractions of ourselves, they also affect the ones around us. That's what most of us tend to forget. It's amazing how much of an affect we can have on each other. Just as we have the ability to create happiness for others, we also have the ability to take it away. We have the ability to frustrate and confuse each other. We have the ability to cause pain. The worst part is that we are able to do this unintentionally.

They say the truth hurts. While that can be true, isn't the blatant pain that arises from knowledge of the truth less painful than that of being lied to? Some people beat around the bush to protect the ones they care about while others do it to protect themselves. Somehow, having power over someone else's thoughts and feelings makes us feel powerful. It's true that being honest and straight-forward can leave you vulnerable, but it's also true that playing games can leave you lonely. The lengths we go to in efforts to attain something or someone can be the exact thing that drives them away.

What I have realized is that anyone and everyone around me has the power to have an affect on me. And if you don't like who you are around someone, how they make you feel or how they cause you to act, it's better to just distance yourself. Sometimes, the idea of someone is far more superior than the person themselves.

"The unreal is more powerful than the real, because nothing is as perfect as you can imagine."