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Time doesn't heal everything

Father's day. This has to be one of the most difficult days of the year.

People say it will get better with time. Yeah, well, people also lie. I've realized that dealing with loss only gets harder with time. At first, I was in a state of shock. I was numb. My mind, body, heart, everything was numb. Everything. My mind refused to register what was going on around me. So, I kept telling myself it was all a dream, and I will wake up soon. The truth is, two years later, I am still trying to convince myself that it is a dream and I'll wake up soon. The only difference is that I'm no longer numb. I can now feel the pain. I think I'd rather just be numb.

Sorry to be such a downer. It is a beautiful day. Those of you that are fortunate enough to spend it with your fathers, enjoy it, and don't take any second for granted.

Happy Father's Day.


  1. i LOVED this :)
    im sorry about your loss but always keep in mind you had a great dad there are people out there like me who have a dad but they arent anywhere close to being a father figure you really are lucky!

  2. Im sorry i took so long to comment on this.. i just did not know what to say. Before that day, i was able to say i have never attended a funeral. umm. not anymore. it was a totally different experience. not only did my second dad have to part. but i had to see my best friend(my sister), my second mom and my second brother and many other family members sobbing and holding you guys. i felt useless and everything seemed blurry. i felt like many ppl already knew me although they had never spoken to me. it was a bitter-sweet moment. i felt surrounded by family but someone was missing. he was the biggest encouragement we ever had. i love you best friens...and i miss him and i cant imagine how much you miss him

  3. Thank you for being here for me through everything. You really are the best friend anyone could ever ask for. My dad absolutely loved you, and he really did consider you his second daughter. I love you

  4. hey, at the time i was your best friend...well one of them. the few months we spent together were great, we had a great time! but i lost you because of my very own mistake, i regret it i really do. there is not much i can do but apologize. i know you know who i am. hope all is well on your side! and i sure do miss you being in my life! i still have a picture of us in my room, i think about your everyday and how i need your shoulder sometimes. but i get thru it. although i have only met your dad once i know he was a great guy because he gave birth to a beautiful girl inside and out :) ill always love you!

    p.s i love your blogs! ive read all of them! you write beautifully!

  5. bff . thats not fair. thats the second time your really made me cry..mel